my first week of school is over. i got all the classes that i wanted and, surprisingly, am enjoying every class that i have. well, almost every class.
i’m back to eating as if to fill an empty hole in me. i tried to put on some old pants of mine and they wouldn’t fit. it made me feel like crying. i really need to go back to starving myself. do i have the willpower? i used to. once upon a time ago. it was second nature. just eat and purge. not even binge and purge because binging would add extra pounds.
i’m fat and nobody loves me (at least in a romantic sense). it would be nice to have someone whom i could love and who could love me back. somebody to hold me. a major problem is that i’m too anti-social to attract any form of attention.
hi, somehow i stumbled on your journal. i hope you don’t mind. i by no means have experianced what you have but i understand where you are coming from. i am glad you are enjoying your classes and i wish you well with the shit your dealing with. if you ever need someone to talk to you can email me. or ignore me, whichever.
justin
you have a beautiful site… If you’re not a graphic designer, you should be (at least some percentage of you;).
Ever chek out the photography of Joel Peter Witkin? It’s 19th century looking sepia, not quite sinister, but dreadful & elegant in a dark sort of way… he’s brilliant. How about the brothers Quay?
Take care,
Rob
To jump off of the previous entry I must commend you on all of your graphic design work, on all of your sites for that fact. I first discovered the SI site about a year ago I think and just now I have found your own personal sites. I have nothing to really say, but that life is excrutiating, but life would be nothing without it. I know stupid cliche proverbs like that don’t really mean anything especially having a background in SI myself, but they are interesting nonetheless. I wish you the best in whatever you do.
Not my name, but more like a pseudonym,
Derek de la Noche
Hey Gabrielle, it’s Scarling from SH. We both seem to be in the same place right now, i swear i could have just wrote that entry. I don’t have anything else to say, just now you are not alone and take care of your self.
wouldn’t it suck to be anorexic? i tried it before but i cant go too long without eating. i only eat once a day cuz i’m kinda getting fat but i dont really consider that anorexic
Hey.
You remind me of myself when I was younger. Guess that’s all I’ve got to say. Do take care,
Luna.