my grade has gone down the toilet in physics. i just can’t get the concepts. i haven’t the faintest clue as how to make new equations out of what is there. it’s really sad. i was getting a decent grade and now i just can’t wrap my mind around it. ah well, i hope i pass.
i’ve had zero inspiration this week. no new ideas for a poem. that makes me sort of sad. i like to write at least one poem a week, whether it’s good or bad. i did write (forced) a poem on a catholic school year. lists of sins. i remember that time. writing my lists of sins in my notebook. so much shame. i was drowning in shame. that’s one the good things about not being religious anymore. i don’t feel bad about every single thing i do. i only feel bad about certain things.
my dad and i got in a fight over a misunderstanding. he’s just so loud. i wish i wouldn’t get so angry every time he yells but i don’t know how to help that. he yells and something goes off in my head telling me not to back down. it had been rather peaceful at home before that.

