i don't know what to talk about or maybe i do but i'm not sure what to say. a girl (who unregistered shortly before) killed herself and it really shook me up. what could i have done? i was just so fucking tired that week and i tried but there was not much else i could do. i did my best. i learned she tried to leave $20,000 to sh in her suicide note. that really threw me for a loop, too. her son, can't forget the four-year-old without his mother. that just really tears at my heart. i thought i didn't have one anymore. i don't know what to say. this world amazes me. in both good and bad ways.
i've not been inspired much in terms of poetry. the hitler love poem was a success, i think. it was the first poem i'd written that i'd liked. strangely enough, someone found this site by looking for 'loving hitler poem' or something to that effect.
Death can be devastating, even in the third degree. And while we can be touched and moved by such a gesture as a $20,000 gift, we can just as easily be dessimated; made to feel wretched because we know that someone else was thinking of us when they died.
I’m sorry that she felt so much pain that she killed herself to escape it. Though, there was little that you or anyone here could do to stop her, when it came to the final act. People bear a burden and a duty to themselves. We offer a place for people to reach out, but there’s no digital hand that can stay a physical knife. Even our words aren’t that strong, no matter how poetically brilliant we like them to be.
It’s okay to be shaken. It’s okay to hurt. And it’s okay to remember and mourn and envy and miss. Best wishes to her soul, and to the child left behind.
Thank you.