some guy my brother knows wanted naked pictures of me. erm, why? i’m not particularly attractive but, eh, i guess you can wank off to anything. more than that, he apparently just started cutting himself. then i found out that my brother’s ex-girlfriend also cuts herself. damn, that boy just seems to attract self-injurers! it’s weird because i know no self-injurers apart from those found at sh and through the site. i know they exist but i guess i never really ask or form close enough relationships with people to test the waters on that subject. i remember a friend from high school used to cut herself. high school. there was no such thing as ‘emo’. it was all about those ‘goths’ or richey edwards idolizers. the subject was nowhere near as common as now and even the other psych hospital patients thought i was crazy. now you supposedly – if you bother with people – can’t make friends in high school without half of them being self-injurers. i don’t know, it’s all so convoluted.

i found this site with bsc recaps that left me quivering and in tears. from laughter, of course. i remember when the whole class of girls was after every one of those damned books and, oh, when we were after this book on flirting. i’m a nerd. i got into bsc fanfiction a while back and a lot of it isn’t half bad. not sure about what is on ff.net but the livejournal fanfiction i found was surprisingly decent. i won’t torture anybody with recs. *g*

i’ve been at turns angst-filled and numb the past few days. i bought a couple poetry books today to fill the void. both by sharon olds. i enjoyed another poetry books of hers, i think. i really need to find some modern poetry and fast. not that sharon olds isn’t modern. i love my emily dickinson but, after last semester, i’m just sick of anything written before the modernists. high modernism, though, was a little much to take at times. rose is a rose is a rose is a rose.

ah, i love little morbid ads like these. used this one in a digital art a few weeks back.

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