i’ve been staying ahead on the reading and essay-writing for school work. i’ve never been this productive but no matter how much i do i feel i’m going to mess up and fail. it’s an annoying feeling.

my parent’s divorce is almost final. my father has come a long way since they first decided. back then he was so angry and ‘crazy’. now he’s calm and we go out about once a week. it’s good to be able to spend time with my father without worrying that he’s going to blow up at me or that he’s going to start talking about the issues he was having with my mother. he still doesn’t take his medication but he seems to be managing his depression somehow.

i’ve been reading fitzwilliam darcy, gentleman. i was surprised to learn it began as fanfiction on the internet. it’s rare but i guess some writers do get discovered through fanfiction. maybe the difference is that her source was in public domain and is beautifully written. yes, it’s fanfiction but it feels true to the original story. the second book of the series has little to do with the romance aspect but it was interesting. nothing at all like mr. darcy takes a wife which was just badly written pride&prejudice smut. it was entertaining but it was still nothing more than sex scenes with a tiny bit of plot about the war with napolean. ah well, anything with darcy and elizabeth being romantic catches my fancy.